PDA

View Full Version : Love's Lost Labours



Leon Kensington
March 5th, 2008, 10:14 PM
So I thought it could be interesting to hear/read people's stories on lost love, with a bit of a geeky edge. Let me give you an example.

I was a junior in highschool (11th Grade) and was in what was called a 'Block Class' it was where during a two-hour block we were taught US History and American Literature so as we were studying the Civil War we read the Red Badge of Courage and as we studyed the Great Depression we read the Grapes of Wrath (the end sucked by the way). Well, there was this girl in the class from another school which was nearby (I was in public school and her's was a private one) which didn't offer the class so she came to our school for it. My friends and I found her rather attractive but being as the we were geeks (though all of us were verging on Varsity in cross country) we found ourselves WAY out of her cheerleading league. Then, one day my friends and I were talking about Final Fantasy X and she quickly joined the conversation. After about five minutes we learned she was a diehard geek who not only played Final Fantasy but could play the music to it on piano. She also played WOW and Counter-Strike. Needless to say, we were enraptured.

Well, sadly the end of the year came and keeping with the geek stereotype of being non-suave with women I didn't ask her out and wow, do I regret that (Boxy, I hope you are taking notes). I've tried to look her up a few times but have never found her. Oh well. Just another example of Love's Lost Labour.

Armando
March 6th, 2008, 12:58 AM
First of all, let me just say: Leon, you just made me feel damn old, man. You were in high school playing Final Fantasy X? My roommate played that game constantly during my last two years of GRAD SCHOOL.

Man, oh man!

Anyway, I have kind of a similar, yet sadder story: I came to the U.S. from Puerto Rico to finish high school at an arts boarding school in Michigan in 1989. There was an informal recital/rehearsal hall on campus which was often left unlocked so we could practice on there, as it had a very nice piano, and it was always nice to sneak in and play and pretend you were concertizing, even thought they kept it down to mood lighting at night. On one of my first nights there I was enjoying playing on a grand, which my family didn't (and still doesn't) own, so it was a new experience for me at the time, when a girl, a drama major, whom I thought was rather cute but, rather unapproachable, came into the room. I, of course, thought that maybe she'd had something going on there or something and asked if she needed me to leave and she said, "no. I like classical piano and am enjoying listening to you." Well I'll be, I thought! A cute girl wants to listen to ME play, in a nearly dark room. Woo hoo!

Well, she proceded to sit in a corner of the room and listen to me play and, to be honest, I kind of got lost in the moment and forgot she was there when some friends of mine came in and started to talk to me. I, of course, mentioned the girl, but being relatively unfamiliar with appropriate slang terms in English (I was fluent, but didn't know the offensiveness of certain words) I asked, "hey, is that chick still in here?"

Well, let me tell you, that didn't go over so well. In fact, she never spoke to me again for the next two years of high school. Needless to say, I'll never call a woman a "chick," language barrier or not (I honestly did not know it was offensive!) again.

GalaxyRanger
March 6th, 2008, 05:55 AM
Ok, here's mine:

High school, 9th grade, I was totally into this girl but I had no idea what to do, so I wrote her a poem. And yeah, I've always been kinda good at writing, so from a purely structural point of view, the poem was flawless. What I, being the über-geek I am, hadn't realized at the time, though, was that conventional Petrarchan love poetry forbids the use of Star Trek Metaphors.

Looking back now, it makes me laugh, but at the time I was devastated. I mean, the only thing I had in mind was Star Trek, that was what my life revolved around, so the greatest compliment I could conceive to pay a girl was to compare her to Star Trek.

Not a good idea! What happened was that I sneaked the poem into her bag, she found it, read it out loud in front of everybody and they had a good laugh and I was stigmatized for years. And the one line, where I likened her radiant beauty to the Enterprise's shining warp nacelles, she read it out loud over and over again and I just wanted to die there on the spot.

Needless to say, she did NOT date me and I had to fight the stereotype for the rest of high school, but I started reading other stuff than Star Trek and since then, I did a much better job with every other poem I wrote and the girls loved it. But in 9th grade, I was the persona non grata. (geek non grata?)

Leon Kensington
March 6th, 2008, 07:37 AM
Oh man, GR that hurts!

frakkintalos
March 6th, 2008, 11:11 AM
Oh the pain!! Group hug.

I can't really add on this. My first girlfriend was my only girlfriend and I married her.

At 13, after much angst over the opposite sex, I decided girls wanted nothing to do with me. I was destined to live my existence alone. I wuz totally kewl wit that until 16. Friends started to drop like flies to the sickness called LOVE. They started gushing and doing cutesy things with their new girlfriends. It was disgusting. So I responded in anger, "What the heck is wrong with me?"

So, one day I'm working in this sweatshop and my buddy says, "Hey my sister just broke up with her boyfriend. Who wants her number?" Normally I would ignored such things but I was curious. My other buddy says, "I'm in a serious relationship right now (it was 2 weeks old). I don't want to mess it up. Hey, why don't you take it? You're single." I hope it is obvious how low the emotional maturity is here. I find it unfair that as human beings our emotional maturity level is ill-equipped to handle our body/hormonal drives. At least from the male perspective.

Needless to say, I take the number. I don't call for a month, though. Said second buddy comes over to watch 'Transformers: The Movie' (the original animated, that shoud be obvious). He says, "Have you called her yet?" I said, "No. She just got out of a relationship. What the heck would she want another one?" He went into how its the best time and other ridiculous, moronic things. Then finally he goads, "You're chicken!"

*shock*

It should be said that I am a reformed dare whore but at the time I was a full-blown dare whore. You dared me, consider it done. So I said, "What?" *sneer*

He smiled. He knew he had me. He started mocking chicken noises.

"Where's the damn number?" I called. No answer. He wouldn't let it go. So the next day, I called again. This time I got her. She was with another guy who she ignored to talk to me. I don't remember what I said on the phone but I could just imagine it pissed the other dude off.

Long story short, we both had no intention of getting involved. We were just friends. We talked for hours. It was fun. Eventually, we succumb to attraction and the rest is a huge history I won't go into here. As I've posted our honeymoon photo elsewhere, being my spouse she is a geek by proxy. I so enjoy hearing her perspective on Trek and sci-fi.

GalaxyRanger
March 6th, 2008, 11:41 AM
Oh the pain!! Group hug.

it's okay, you can let go no, Mr. man-crush on Bill Shatner :-D
sorry, just kidding of course.


I can't really add on this. My first girlfriend was my only girlfriend and I married her.

well that sure spared you a lot of trouble. plus, I saw the photo of your kids here somewhere, they're gorgeous, so great job! but I must have missed the honeymoon pic...


Oh man, GR that hurts!

Nah, it's okay, it was such a stupid thing to do, I totally laugh about it now. The warp nacelles :D

frakkintalos
March 6th, 2008, 12:07 PM
I saw the photo of your kids here somewhere, they're gorgeous, so great job!

Thank you. Me proud papa so I'll post again

http://i271.photobucket.com/albums/jj125/frakkintalos/thegirls.jpg



but I must have missed the honeymoon pic...


http://i271.photobucket.com/albums/jj125/frakkintalos/geeks.jpg

Armando
March 6th, 2008, 02:59 PM
Thank you. Me proud papa so I'll post again

http://i271.photobucket.com/albums/jj125/frakkintalos/thegirls.jpg



http://i271.photobucket.com/albums/jj125/frakkintalos/geeks.jpg

Aww geeze! I was going to make some smarmy reference to G.O.B. Bluth's "chicken dance" in response to your dare story (co-cka-co-cka-co-cka!!!!) but man, you guys are too cute. :D

(I'll have to find the picture of our wedding cake, whose centerpiece was Han and Leia...)

Starbuccaneer
May 20th, 2008, 12:06 PM
What I, being the über-geek I am, hadn't realized at the time, though, was that conventional Petrarchan love poetry forbids the use of Star Trek Metaphors.

Looking back now, it makes me laugh, but at the time I was devastated. I mean, the only thing I had in mind was Star Trek, that was what my life revolved around, so the greatest compliment I could conceive to pay a girl was to compare her to Star Trek.

Not a good idea! What happened was that I sneaked the poem into her bag, she found it, read it out loud in front of everybody and they had a good laugh and I was stigmatized for years. And the one line, where I likened her radiant beauty to the Enterprise's shining warp nacelles, she read it out loud over and over again and I just wanted to die there on the spot.

Wow, GR. That is amazing. I don't think that can be topped. Good to hear that you're more philosophical about it, now.


Oh the pain!! Group hug.

I can't really add on this. My first girlfriend was my only girlfriend and I married her.

Aaawwww... as a non-believer in first loves, that's still a really cute story.


(I'll have to find the picture of our wedding cake, whose centerpiece was Han and Leia...)

Wow. Again, untoppable. Good wife.


Yeah, I don't have any one agonizing story like the warp nacelles, mostly because I just straight up didn't bother to try to date non-geeks. My first love, as I have said elsewhere, started our relationship off with a date to see Episode I, and we broke up right after seeing Episode II. I later dated a wonderful girl who was way into SCA and other extremely dorky stuff like Highlander. There was also the girl who worked in a cafe that didn't use electricity because she was really that crunchy. And there was the one who really loved really bad fantasy novels. Or the one who really liked trains and the history of trains. See, here these are like badges of courage, but elsewhere people laugh at me for these stories. Hah, I say to that. Hah.

GalaxyRanger
May 20th, 2008, 01:30 PM
Wow, GR. That is amazing. I don't think that can be topped. Good to hear that you're more philosophical about it, now.

Don't tell the Thot Guy about it, though... he'll spread the word faster than you can say "jump"

Pike
May 20th, 2008, 01:38 PM
My first love, as I have said elsewhere, started our relationship off with a date to see Episode I, and we broke up right after seeing Episode II. I later dated a wonderful girl who was way into SCA and other extremely dorky stuff like Highlander. There was also the girl who worked in a cafe that didn't use electricity because she was really that crunchy. And there was the one who really loved really bad fantasy novels. Or the one who really liked trains and the history of trains.

Damn, that's like the history of geekdom. I think you're just a Comic Book Gal shy of a complete set.

Solai
May 20th, 2008, 01:45 PM
So...

Sixth grade. Here is Solai fresh out of all boy school in NYC finding himself in the wilds of Connecticut...specifically public school...

...with girls.

Now, I wasn't a complete stranger to the fairer sex. At this point in my sexual development:


1. I had kissed a girl next to a Coke machine during coffee hour at church (Third grade)

2. "Dated" a girl, which meant that I met a girl at a square dance in fourth grade and we talked on the phone occasionally. We had big plans to go see "The Right Stuff" but they never materialized.

So I arrive in Connecticut at a public school to a group of people whom appear to have known each other since nursery school. Seriously. They were nice enough to me, welcoming even. I was astounded at how naturally the guys acted around the girls. My limited experience with girls was in closely monitored controlled environments...this was just strange. Each recess everyone would run around playing their reindeer games and I just felt too uncomfortable to join.

My clever and intelligent solution was to avoid the situation. I discovered sanctuary in the school's library where instead of going out to recess I would help with whatever needed doing. This was perfect as I needed time to collect myself in this time of massive adjustment.

Enter Julie. Julie was radiant, intelligent and lovely...although I wouldn't realize this until much later. I clearly remember being in a back room of the library cataloging language tapes when she entered the dark room.


"Hey Solai, what are you doing?"

"Cataloging."

"Wow. That is so cool. Do you like it?"

"It's ok I guess. What are you doing back here?"

"Nothing."

This conversation lasted 15 minutes until the bell rang. I wouldn't have thought anything of it, but it happened again the next day. Once again I was in the back room when she appeared,


"Hey Solai, what are you doing?"

"Cataloging."

"Wow. Hey...do you live at 123 Plainview?"

"Yeah, how did you know that?"

"Oh, I went to the school office and looked it up."

"Oh. Ok. Yeah."

The schoolbell rang and once again our conversation ended. This type of conversation happened everyday for the next two weeks. She would express interest in me, or know something about me and I would simply confirm what she had learned. At the end of the two weeks I was home and the phone rang.

"Solai, Julie's on the phone!" My mother's eyes were huge and she suppressed a joyous smile as she handed me the phone.


"Hey Solai, what are you doing?"

"Nothing. What are you doing?"

"Nothing really. Thinking about you mostly."

<blink>

"Thinking about me? Why?"

"Well, I like you."

"Oh. That's nice."

"...what?"

"That's nice."

"THAT'S NICE?!?!?" she said. "I HAVE BEEN THROWING MYSELF AT YOU FOR TWO WEEKS AND ALL YOU CAN SAY IS THAT'S NICE?"

"Uh. Yeah. That is nice of you to say."

"Fine. Have a nice one Solai."

I stood staring at the phone wondering what the heck just happened. It took me about three or four years to come back to the memory and realize what had occurred. Given my all boy school background I had no capacity to understand her overtures. Television in the early 80s didn't help matters either...attraction of the opposite sex was something adults and high schoolers did. My friends and I played with frogs. Needless to say after sixth grade we were never close again...we never talked and generally avoided each other's company.

Epilogue to the story is that I bumped into Julie at our 10 year high school reunion.


"Hey Solai, how are you doing?"

"Fine Julie, yourself?"

"Pretty good. Married. Two kids, live a little bit north, yourself?"

"Dating someone. Pretty serious, ring is picked."

"That is great Solai." <pause> "You know, I have always felt a little bad for what happened between us."

"You know, me too. I was such a klutz. I was simply clueless. I am sorry for being such a dunce."

"No, I should have been more patient. You were the new kid from an all boy school. I overreacted."

"Call it even?"

"Sure."

We hugged. One of the best I have ever had. Whenever I see a show or movie that has an alternate universe I wonder where my life would have gone if things had been different, if I had been a little less clueless and she had been a little more patient. Probably nowhere really...this was sixth grade, relationships came and went like yesterday's cafeteria Sloppy Joe's.

Makes me smile and shake my head ruefully everytime tho. Then again, all I have to do is look at a picture of Lil' Solai and Mrs. Solai and it becomes abundantly clear that all is right with the universe.

GalaxyRanger
May 20th, 2008, 04:05 PM
Hach, wunderschön.

You know, I'm the kind of guy whose eyes get watery when he reads something like that. Seriously.

I love that story.